The 20-40-60 Rule: Why You Should Stop Caring What People Think

It's hard not to wonder what people think of you, but are they really thinking of you?

“When you’re 20 you care what everyone thinks, when you’re 40 you stop caring what everyone thinks, when you’re 60 you realize no one was ever thinking about you in the first place.” — Unknown

Are you still worried about what others think of you?

When you get to be as old as I am, you realize no one pays much attention to you except for where their interests are aligned. There are very few exceptions. Even close family gets wrapped up in their own affairs.

Stop worrying about what others think of you. They aren’t thinking of you at all. If not for your own hubris, you would realize how little you think of others in your rush to do this, that and the other.

No one sums it up better than lexicographer Samuel Johnson:

“But the truth is, that no man is much regarded by the rest of the world, except where the interest of others is involved in his fortune. The common employments or pleasures of life, love or opposition, loss or gain, keep almost every mind in perpetual agitation. If any man would consider how little he dwells upon the condition of others, he would learn how little the attention of others is attracted by himself.”

My aim is not to belittle you, dear friend. I wish to set you free. For dwelling on the thoughts of others is a prison from which there is no escape. What people actually think of you is tied to their own peculiar needs. What about yours?

Vanity often overrules common sense in the strong current toward acceptance. It will rob you blind. Dreams fall by the wayside in pursuit of what you think others find attractive.

Stop caring what other people think. Love them. Cherish them. But start doing what makes your heart sing!


🤔 Food for Thought:

How much do you care about what other people think?

What do you think they care about?

Is this just your perception?


⚙️ One Small Step:

Think about how busy each day typically is. How much time do you devote to others outside of your immediate family? Be honest. Not much, right? Why do you expect something different from everyone else?